This Is Who I Am

Why this blog has the domain address of “priptonaweird.co.uk” is because – one: It was primarily started to be more of a dedicated site to Jim, but would encompass and embrace all things Simple Minds. I never had any intention to make it some “super serious – uber fan” blog. It started as fun. 100% fun – with lots of ogling and drooling and petty fangirling.

Then I started to share the memorabilia I was collecting. Then talking about Jim’s FB posts and maybe screengrabbing a reply I got from him that I loved or thought was amusing. Also it became a place for my “art”. As I made my digital fan art and also began drawing and painting. And then going to gigs – and not just SM ones – and it just kept growing and growing and I thought I wanted it to be taken more seriously. A place where maybe “serious” SM fans could actually find useful information and learn something they hadn’t known before, etc, etc.

I started to conduct interviews: First with Jaine Henderson, then with Bruce Findlay, last year with Steve Jeffris of Warm Digits, and this year with Stuart Crouch and most recently – and most professionally too (I guess) with The Anchoress.

And that’s been great. I love doing those kind of things – although the interviews can terrify me! As much work as each post can be, I have been really loving doing the posts for Minds Music Monday on the Sons/Sister 40th Anniversary. And some of these posts came together with the help of Malcolm Garrett as well. I’m proud of all those posts.

But with that pride has crept in an embarrassment – because also, this blog has always had a personal slant to it. It is my own personal blog. That’s why the web address is what it is! It’s why it doesn’t have a “Simple Minds” name to it. I could have hauled it over. I could have bought a Simple Minds reflective domain name – but I love that this domain name is associated to ME!

Today has been another incredibly tough day. For reasons I don’t actually feel able to talk about right now but it is going to have a lasting impact on me. It’s been very emotional today. A lot of tears. I feel like I have spent sssoooo much of the past 12 months crying – esp. the past 9 months.

Sitting about, drying my tears, feeling embarrassed – yet again! When I was thinking about the blog and thinking about how open I’ve been on here of late – again…feeling embarrassed. But WHY?! Why should I feel embarrassed by my emotions?! Why should I be embarrassed to feel things and want things and want to be able to express things?! If I express them here and that ultimately allows me to work through those things and sort my shit out, isn’t that good?!

***I KNOW**** I overshare, and overthink, and over-analyse and … all of these things. I know this!
But this is MY place! This is me! As I used to say in the past – and I really need to remember this because this is what I was saying to myself this afternoon – MY BLOG, MY RULES! I am NOT beholden to ANYONE. And I am NOT going to try and make this blog into something it isn’t. As much as I feel I want to make this blog 100% professional with only serious band-specific content – IT ISN’T GOING TO HAPPEN!

This used to be my retreat. The place I would run to for comfort and fun and happiness. It is still a place I am running to but for different reasons. Because now it feels like it is the only place I am understood, the only place I feel able to be me. And, well, even that hasn’t felt entirely so lately. But I am taking that back! I want this to be my safe place. If I am not understood – tough! If you come here and read content and think I share too much – tough! With all due respect – I take your concerns on board. I am aware of them. Let it be known that I concern myself also – okay!!!! Nobody is more aware of my mental instability than me – OKAY?!

And even THIS will be deemed “oversharing” but … I’m working through stuff, okay.

To the people who visit, always, thank you. You don’t have to and lord bloody knows why you do…but holy heck, thank you for doing so. Whatever you gain out of each visit, I hope it is informative, useful or mercy be on the rare occasion FUN!

Welcome to Priptona’s weird, wonderful world of … whatever!

2 thoughts on “This Is Who I Am

  1. You are wonderfully special to put it all out there. It is like a refreshment of honesty that needs to be executed. Not many people know it is a form of healing the soul. It does not matter what you say or place out there for everyone to see they all will have a different opinion depending on there own mind thoughts and reasonings. And you can not please everyone so be happy you know your own truth about it and carry on….

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