Eureka Day! The Assignment Breakthrough

I’ve had a breakthrough today. A ‘Eureka’ moment, so I’m thinking about this (pic below) right now….just for now. I’ll have to erase it from my mind shortly and get on with the task at hand. I feel ssoooo driven today now. And soooo capable! I can actually feel it. Almost a CONFIDENCE that I can do this assignment now. It’s only taken SIX WEEKS! Jeez-o!

EUREKA!

Sentimentalities…

Earlier in the year, Christophe, from the wonderful, City Of Light, a French Simple Minds tribute band, got in contact with me about the badges I had been sent of my ‘art’ by a lady named Samantha. I told him I was happy to send some to him.

It’s taken a while due to there still being some Covid restrictions about for City of Light to be getting back to gigs. Christophe had let me know the badges arrived safely and he would wear them when performing. Only recently did I see some wonderful photos with him wearing one of the badges I had sent. You’ll see a couple of photos below.

Well, today Samantha saw a photo of Christophe meeting Jim at Tilloloy and he is wearing the badge again. How wonderful is that?! I was already so honoured that Christophe wanted to wear badges of mine, but for him to be wearing one meeting Jim? Just lovely. It made my day!

Thank you, Christophe. And thank you again to Samantha for having made them and send them on to me. I’ll be forever grateful. You definitely made Blenheim one of the good memories. Thank you ❤️

Corrected Thing…

His Master’s Voice informed me that I had one itty bitty bit of the lyrics to Vision Thing incorrect…so, I have altered it.

Thought I was in a Covid fug when I saw the correction there for me. Lol. I received no notification of it.

Anyway…tis fixed.

Vision Thing Lyrics

I’m meant to be writing an essay on philosophy – Instead I deciphered some lyrics and was inspired to present them with some Priptona Art.

I present to you… Vision Thing!

I hope Lily doesn’t sue me! But her image was perfect. I added my own flare…as much as time and inclination allowed. I’ve not been keeping up the practice with my visual art of late. I do like what I did though.

Five Years Of Priptona Art Facebook Page

But over seven years of producing the art though. Writing and study have taken over in recent months. I’m not sure when I last made anything. It has always been my own “Act Of Love”.

The “art” always expressed the things that I wanted to say when words failed me. Mostly “I love you, Jim” is pretty much what every single piece said. Well, perhaps they more accurately said “I love this song, and I love the words this man has written for it.” That’s what I really hope they all said.

The page will continue to exist. And now and then there still might be the odd giveaway. Perhaps there still may just be a new piece of artwork from time to time – never say never – but I feel my creativity is moving in another direction. Perhaps in the direction it was always meant to go? Who knows?

Thanks to everyone who ever took an interest in what I was making and producing. Those who followed the FB page and gave me feedback. Those who took time to enter competitions and giveaways.

Biggest thanks of all to Jim, for being an inspiration, a muse and for…creating a monster by giving me such a wonderful gift of that Hunter And The Hunted post. Lol. I’m sorry I subsequently made a complete tit of myself for the proceeding seven years.

It was an Act Of Love.

Minds Music Monday – Superman v Supersoul

The weather over the weekend has been glorious and continues to be wonderfully sunny, if not still a wee bit cold. I am looking forward to warmer days. The sun has been lovely and thank god that, it least as hours of sun is concerned, spring has sprung. Those rays just need to be a tad warmer yet. No fear of me taking my ‘tap aff’ just yet! Lol

Today’s choice for me conjures up warm weather. A dusky late afternoon basking in glorious sunshine. A sun that warms body and soul.

Visions of Angkor Wat, or maybe the Kedarnath Temple in Gopeshwar in northern India…or any other temple that is within range of the Himalayas.

Happy spring!

Minds Music Monday – Careful In Career

This week I will be somewhat cheating, as I did a lengthy post about this song for MMM barely six months ago. I wanted to post about it last week, as the song was my earworm over the previous weekend and I was just feeling a lot of love for it. But Empires That Dance had just brought out their version of Someone Somewhere In Summertime and what with it being Valentine’s Day and all….

So here I am this week, still thinking about and loving Careful In Career.

One thing I will say is that during my choosing of the six tracks that I chose for the Son/Sister anniversary celebration on Pulse 98.4 with Ronnie McGhie, Careful In Career only just missed the cut.

Also, the piece of “fan art” I did for the song is still one of my most favourite pieces.

Sorry it’s so short and sweet this week. Uni study and the excitement of the tour recommencing and the imminent trip to Paris are all dominating my thoughts at the moment. I hope to do a more substantial post next week – no promises though!

Happy MMM!

Minds Music Monday – Jeweller To The Stars/The Jeweller (Part 2)

I don’t know why I have it stuck in my head as a Charlie Burchill song, but I just do. And by a Charlie song, I mean it being a song about Charlie.I don’t know where I have got that implanted in my head. It must have been something Jim had said when talking about the song? Perhaps he just expressed a particular likeness for Charlie’s guitar work on the track? Whatever it was, I have thought of “Jeweller” as Charlie’s song ever since.

Proving also that inspiration can come from just about anywhere, Jim said the lyrics came about from him seeing an advert in a magazine. I love it when he can share stories of defined examples of lyrical inspiration. I am sure most times his lyrics are an amalgam of inspiration. Pieces of a mosaic, as obscure and ambiguous as his words can be. Esp. early on in his songwriting. Never really a single point of focus. Well that’s how it seems anyway.

I like both the recorded versions of the song that I’ve heard. Both are very similar in sound with no real variation in lyrics, only just some backing vocal lyrics on one version, with Jim’s voice alternating in left and right channels to say “I want you – I still want you” – which for me is seductively sexy. 

“When all seems lost, you’ll find the diamonds in the rough” is the general optimistic message of the song. Well, that’s how I interpret it.

Pick out the jewels.

Minds Music Monday – Space

This song has a similar personal feeling for me than Spaceface does. Almost like they fit hand in glove. Even with the similarities in title – Space/Spaceface. There’s also a line within Wonderful In Young Life that fits in with the theme that I find particularly poignant. “Surviving these changes in paces and faces in free wonder, free wonder, free wonder style.” 

For the two minutes I decided to try and sell my “art” as a kind of merch thing, selling prints, shirts and mugs, I titled my “business” Free Wonder Style. Paid for a web domain and everything. Feels another lifetime ago now. Hey ho. 

Anyway, I digress already and we’re barely under way!

Space always felt like a “letting go” song. It resonated most with me when the “limerence” was at its worst. When I felt that Jim wanted “no more”. The placement of that idea? That signal? That came wholly within my own mind. When you’re wanting something so much. Wanting to feel a connection that you wish for all the world is there but deep down, within your rational mind, you know it isn’t. It can’t ever be. It never was. 

“Imagination wears you out / crying brings you down again. The dream is over / the feeling’s gone / and we were something / you were dreaming all along.”

YOU WERE DREAMING ALL ALONG. 

Everything about the song. Each line. Each line would just be like….

But then I’d hole on to the uplifting bits. “I’m the star you see tonight / and I wish I may / I wish I might / be in your dreams tonight.” 

How many times I have been in bed at night, getting ready to settle down to sleep and I have silently mouthed a little chant of “please let me dream of him, please let me dream of him”.

I did it again last night! But he appeared. With the rest of the band. I couldn’t quite work out the scenario of the dream. I think I was allowed to go to see them rehearse somewhere. Cherisse greeted me in the dream. Let me in, showed me round. I bumped into Charlie. We had a brief chat but then he had to go off. As for Jim? Well, he was busy elsewhere, conducting interviews and what not. I saw him at the far end of one area within this kinda “complex” this dream was set in, but he was too far away from me to even say hello to or anything. 

My dreams generally have a huge smack of reality to them. 

It’s a song that I feel makes me come to terms with things. And I hate how ridiculous that makes me sound! The whole “limerence” thing. I don’t want it to be a “thing”, you know? 

Like I said in my previous post discussing limerence. I feel like I am an otherwise intelligent and rational person. And I fear my explanation of my own “limerence” is not clear enough. I feel like I have to explain myself over and over again. I am NOT so deluded as to want “romantic love” from Jim! It really isn’t that! I don’t want to “run off with him”! That’s fucking ridiculous! I’m not THAT absurd or that much of a fantasist! 

It really was just – friendship. A bond. I like you, and I hope you like me too. I just have been craving a closeness that just isn’t there. I have me and my small bunch of friends and well, Jim joked way back before Simple Minds got REALLY big that he had 8000 friends – or whatever astronomical figure it was then. And I know – rational hat on, that there are many people he’s known for years, all his life nearly. People he calls pals who he’d hardly have any contact with! So…who the fuck am I? What kind of fucking audacity have I got to wish for getting emails or letters or shite like that from him, eh? I mean, Jesus! It would be different if I had known him from when I was wee. Like, really known him outside of Minds and all that. Knew him as “Jim fae Prospecthill Circus” like, you know? But I don’t.

That “just a fan” status thing is hard to take. But it’s the cold, hard reality of it. It doesn’t stop it from sucking ass though!

Sometimes…just to stop it hurting sometimes, I initiate the whole “it’s his loss” talk. It doesn’t make it any less painful. And it really doesn’t apply. It cannae. I cannae make him give two shits. And it’s not fair on him that I try and enforce it, like. 

So, getting back to Space. It makes me comes to terms with what is. What the “status quo” is. Where the lay of the land is. But, it still has that hope in it! Goddamnit! Like all Simple Minds songs do. It’s like it says to me “I know what you want, but you cannae have it. But, you can have it in your dreams.”

Well, of course I can have it in my dreams. I can have anything in my dreams. And I’m not even gonna go into the dreams I can have. Oh, the dreams I can have! That would make for some colourful posts, I tell ya!

Spaceface is more the antithesis of Space. Spaceface is pure joy. My “happy place”, as I call it. Pure “hunner per cent” uplifting. It’s my number one “feel good” Simple Minds track. Whereas Space is…a lament. There are things I want that I can’t have and I have to accept that. But…it’s okay to dream. It’s okay to want those things. To desire them. To wish for them. But don’t let it consume you. And there are times…too many times it feels as if it has consumed me. It has overtaken everything and made me ill. Or it has been exacerbated by another element of mental illness and I used it erroneously as a coping mechanism against other aspects of combating episodes of mental illness. 

I still find it INCREDIBLY difficult to admit to and talk openly about my mental ill health. I don’t want to be seen as “mental” or “sick”. And I fear what people think of me – and it’s a vicious cycle because it is such an integral part of my ill health – that CONSTANT fear and concern of what people think of me and how I am perceived by others. But that is something I cannot alter. I cannot alter people’s perceptions of me. And in whatever way people perceive me, if it is an a way that is negative and it means they distance themselves from me – well, IT IS “their loss”. But the “people pleaser” in me continues to struggle to come to terms with that. Even though I accept and understand all the rationale behind it. You CAN’T have EVERYBODY like you! You just can’t. And nor should you want to. And Jim falls into that, you know?

It’s a whole jumbled up plethora of stuff.

Space is sometimes a very hard listen for me because of what the song symbolises to me.

When I am at my worst, mental health wise, I would cling on so much to the line “if you’re talking / I will listen”. Because sometimes it felt like Jim was listening to me. 

It still stings my eyes with tears just how much I used to feel that and how much I have held on to it. How tightly I have held onto that. 

It’s a long, slow letting go. I had been alone for so long. Before 2014 and Simple Minds mega fandom. So alone. Never imagined in a million years that Jim himself would make me feel welcome and part of the fold. It was a lighting of touch paper though. And such emotional sparks flew from within. 

An inferno that is slowly quelling to kindling. 

“The dream is over / party’s over.”

Star light. That light needs to shine from within.