“They’ll be coming” – not exactly the three little words most people will get filled with an overriding sense of joy and the HUGEST avalanche of relief from but…you know…I think we’ve established I’m not “most people”. Lol
But those words on Friday? That’s how they made me feel.
I wasn’t going to go into detail on Friday. I just wanted to put up my own three little words in response and have that be that. But, if any of you reading this is a regular visitor here – you have been witness to what complete and utter angst I have been going through these past months. Tying myself up in knots. Never being able to get past and move on. Having little niggles gnaw away at me constantly.
I have to say I have NEVER been so thankful for football, and more to the point, Scotland winning a match! And making it into the Euros.
I had been counting the days myself, for a completely different reason and thing. It took seven months. SEVEN MONTHS from “Jalopy” to the “Tartan Army”. Seven months that with each passing day, week, month just seemed to get progressively worse.
God knows I tried to brush it aside! But sometimes the more I tried, the worse it got. I honestly don’t need to explain. LOOK AT THE BLOG!
I already feel the little niggles creeping back. “But did he know it was me? I had changed my profile pic to one of me as a ten year old – so if he looks for visual clues for fans then mine wouldn’t have been obvious.” But then I think, “but who else is called LARELLE, you div?! He knew it was you. Stop being an idiot. JUST BE HAPPY.” And I allow the relief to fill me again.
Yep. It’s all very stupid and irrational, I know. But all I could see was him looking at me with that face in Copenhagen. And yes, “Jalopy” happened about a month after the gig. But as time moved on, I kept believing that the jalopy reply was a kind of “sign off”.
I genuinely cannot express enough the amount of relief I had on Friday. I almost couldn’t believe it happened. And then I kept waiting for it to disappear…like I had just dreamed it or imagined it. I just went to have a look again and – it’s still there. I didn’t just imagine it. It actually happened.
And I am so, so happy and relieved. But I still hope you stay around a bit more, Jim. Us fans, we all love you so much! You’ve read the book now. You know how much you mean to us all! Yes, okay, for quite a number it is all essentially about the music and its effects – but you are the man that helped to make it. All of the effect springs from you! And while you are reeling from having to remain grounded from there having been a ton of rescheduling and touring put on hold, we’re all missing it too as fans. But just a small booster. One little antidote to things is you just being around. That we can bounce off each other and keep each other all feeling upbeat and hopeful of things getting better.
I know there are whiney shits. Hell, I’m one of them! But I love knowing that you’re here and you’re with us and that you’re okay. So, please. Don’t be a stranger, Jim. And please talk if you can. To some of us in replies to comments. Or to all of us with a video message or something. We’d take any little morsels you’re willing to offer!
But, finally, personally…one last time. THANK YOU! I absolutely adore you. You know. I mean, geez, I used to say it – long before the book – that if you ever needed a boost to your ego and confidence, just come here. Look at my blog! Look how much you are loved and adored just by me alone.