It Was Just A Silly Joke

Not meant to be taken seriously.

Let me explain.

As I was travelling back home to the UK I posted to the SMO FB visitor wall about having Jim greet me at Glasgow Airport.

I can’t remember what I wrote exactly. I was on the plane at the time and hadn’t slept for some time so I can’t recall exactly how I worded it. But I had joked in the comments of a post written a few days before about him greeting me at the airport.

This post to the visitor wall was a “reminder” – you know “tomorrow, 3pm, be there or be square” kind of thing. Just a silly thing. Light hearted.

So why was it deleted? Who got offended by it? Was it the mention of a certain Glasgow doughnut shop? I don’t work on commission for them!!! Simple Minds have no trouble with me mentioning the band everywhere else… or running this blog as a massive advert for them.

I know I am being oversensitive worrying about why it was removed but I just get miffed about this crap.

It was just starting to feel nice again. Jim was starting to post a bit more and those months of feeling persona non grata were going away… and now this!?

I dunno. Why do I bother?

As petty as a post like that is… you just do it for a bit of fun. When it gets deleted, it feels like a kick in the guts. Like, “Oh FFS, what have I done wrong now?!” Are you just trying to tell me to fuck off? Well… just tell me to fuck off then.

Meh. Never mind, eh?

Let’s just count the days until Copenhagen and delude myself he still likes me. If he ever did.

Sign O’ The Times…

Okay. I know it’s Christmas and Sir has got to have his family time. And I know the tour needs to be pushed. But!!

FUCKING HELL – I MISS HIM! I miss how Simple Minds Official was.

What’s happened? Why has he stepped away from it so much? I thought it was because of his Da – and that I (obviously) understood. But I’m starting to think it wasn’t so much about his Da at all.

I dunno.

It’s a sad indictment on me if I miss him this much, I guess. Considering I just lost my mum and I’m worried about bloody Jim flipping Kerr!

Shit… says a lot about me, doesn’t it?

It feels like both ends of that beautiful tie is gone.

Four years ago when I was in Oz, I felt like I had both mum AND Jim. My time with mum was precious and Jim made it more special.

And now… both feel gone 😔😔😔

Well… mum is absolutely gone. And I can’t shake this feeling while being here of “When are we going to see mum? It’s been great staying at Gwenda’s, but can we go and stay with mum now? Aren’t we going to visit her?”

There was an open coffin at the funeral. I saw her there… laying in state! My mind refuses to accept it. There is a void. I miss her. So much! But I have hardly shed a tear. There’s a detachment from not being here in the final days before she passed. And so I am missing her and can’t grieve properly. It’s kind of awful.

A strange limbo…

Jim is linked to my final memories of mum… and I miss him.

I just miss how SMO used to be. Not so much corporate whoring. A human touch. And Jim very much at the centre of it.

I miss you so much, Jim, because I miss my mum.

Anyway… we better get our tour tickets. Well, I have 11 now. That’s more than enough.

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Feeling “Part Of It”?

Not always. Not often at all, really. It just brings home to me the years missed.

And…Jim felt like the glue that bonded the fanbase together. We talk with each other THROUGH him, so to speak. I miss that part of the interactivity soo much! That he was the catalyst.

I see little point in SMOG otherwise. It’s just another SM group, and I’m in enough of those already and don’t feel much of a part of things as is.

Sorry…I’m just having a “woe is me” moan/whingefest.

*sigh*

It’s Kinda Quiet…

Again. I mean…we’ve got the tour coming next year. LITCoA recently came out. The “40” compilation is released on Friday – the day after I turn 49 (HELP! Lol)

They’re at the Scottish Music Awards at the end of November.

And of course there are other extenuating circumstances why things have been quiet.

And on a personal level – the blog is taking a back seat while house-hunting take precedence. I’ve been up and down the country like a yoyo these past two weeks. Up to Glasgow, back to Luton for a day, then down to Bristol and further south west to Devon, back to Luton for a few days and just back last night from another fleeting visit to Glasgow.

I wanted to review seeing Toyah in Bristol last Sunday but I just feel like it’s non stop right now. Exciting, don’t get me wrong, but draining also.

We lost out on one property and we’ll be going for another this week. I think the Scottish market is really healthy right now. It feels it. There is pretty of stiff competition with other buyers out there right now. It’s a seller’s market for sure.

So currently my head just swims with decisions on making offers, how much for, etc, etc. “Offers over…market value…look at the home report…Google Maps Street View reccy…is it worth travelling 400 miles to view it with my own eyes?” Etc, etc…

“Where are the good parts of Glasgow?” Just…endless factors to consider.

Barely had time to do any professional ogling of late. Lol. Though the visit to Devon was to see Virginia and get some “professional” ogling in. Lol. But nothing is happening for me artistically. Don’t know the last time it was when I worked on any art.

I would love it if my next visit to Glasgow was an actual move but who knows?

Yesterday I was in the Flying Duck having an early tea before setting off for Luton (I keep going to say “home” when referring to Luton and then stop myself because I want Glasgow to be home). I walked in and they were playing Talking Heads…and then this came on and it felt SSOOOO apt!

And then tonight discussing all the whys and wherefores with the OH, this came on the radio…

We’ll see later in the week, I guess. And perhaps there might be a bit more SM news too? Or Jim will come back. It’s silly to say how much I miss him…but I just do. The interactivity on SMO is just not the same without him being around.

Lucky I have house-hunting to take my mind off things, I suppose…